I'm Not a Feminist...Or Am I?

This summer, my church's women's Bible Study is on the topic of "Becoming a True Woman." If you haven't already realized it, femininity (according to the Bible) and God's plan and design for women is something I highly value - it is a passion for me. Sadly, however, our society has strayed far from true femininity. In fact, the feminist movement has "defeminized" (if that's a word) women and has striven to make women as much like men as possible.

We are going through the book, Becoming God's True Woman, edited by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, and watching a video series from "True Woman," a conference that was held in Chicago last year. In the video we watched last week, Mary Kassian went over the history of feminism. It was very interesting to see how we went from the "Leave it to Beaver" society in the 50's to where we are today.

While I'd like to think that I'm far from being a feminist, I was reminded just last night at how I have let worldly feminism creep into my life. Yesterday was one of those days. You know, the ones where you feel like it's never going to end and your list of things to do goes on forever. It had been a long day, and my evening was just beginning. I had bathed the baby (which is exhausting in and of itself), fed her, and gotten her ready for bed. Then, the pile of dishes in the kitchen stared me down. Dinner was one of those meals where it seems like I ended up using every dish and utensil in my kitchen - or at least all of the ones that should be hand washed. After cleaning up the dinner mess, I still had to clean up and organize the house for the day and fold the laundry that was sitting in the dryer, just calling my name. I was exhausted, and frankly, I just wanted to sit on the couch and do nothing. In fact, I found myself thinking that it would be so much easier to just work a 9-5 job instead of having to take care of the house and my family. It would be so nice to have a job that I could leave at the end of the day and be done with. However, I am "stuck" at work. I LIVE at work and there is always something that I can and/or need to be doing. There is no lunch break, no 15-minute breaks, no weekends, no holidays, etc. Even though James offers his assistance, my job is still physically and, sometimes, emotionally draining. Why can't I just have a "normal" job. Then it hit me! I had a feminist attitude - the same attitude that started and fueled the feminist movement. What an awakening that was for me! At that moment, I was thinking that society's definition of a true woman was better than God's definition of a true woman.

One of the ways the feminist revolution began was through Consciousness Raising Groups. These were groups of women who would get together to discuss their feelings about being a woman. Basically, it was an opportunity for women to vent about how miserable their lives were and discuss the advantage that men had. As they listened and began to participate in these groups, even women who weren't unhappy in their role as a housewife began to share these feelings of dissatisfaction and discontent, and the revolution spread rapidly. It was those same sinful, selfish feelings that I was having last night that greatly contributed to feminism. All I could do was pray. Pray that God would change my heart at that moment and that I would see that God's plan was the best thing for me. I don't even want to imagine what could or would happen if I let those feelings take hold of me. Yes, being a wife and mother is hard and sometimes I just want to be able to "clock out," but there is great beauty this work. I just need to look at it through a biblical perspective instead of a worldly perspective.

My heart is truly burdened for girls in the church. I pray that they will see how beautiful and GOOD God's design is and choose to follow Him rather than what society is trying to embed in them. I know that I have a responsibility to teach them and to lead them by example. Titus 2:3-5 says, "Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored." That's a HUGE responsibility! I pray that God would use me as a tool in teaching the next generation just what it means to be a woman. I pray that my daughter will grow up to value God's design for her and that she will be a "worker at home." Whether she gets married or not, has kids or not, she is called to display her femininity as God designed it. As we watch society stray farther and farther from God's great plan, it is all the more important for us to daily CHOOSE to follow Him and to teach it to our children and those around us. The feminist movement started with just a small group of women and spread to what it is today. I am excited to be part of a relatively small group of women who are part of a new counterrevolution!

Disclaimer: After thinking about it, I realized it might sound like I'm not happy being a wife and a mother. So let me just make it clear that I absolutely LOVE my job as a wife and a mother and I am SO THANKFUL that I have a husband who is willing and able to work hard to provide for our family so that I am able to be at home. It's just that, well, I'm sinful (big surprise, there!) and sometimes I don't find joy in my job. But God is gracious and faithful to show me my sin and selfishness and lead me toward repentance. :)

Happy Father's Day!!!

This Father's Day is a very special one, as it is James' first official Father's Day. I understand that technically speaking, he was already a father last year, but this year is his first Father's Day with a child he can actually cuddle and hold! To celebrate, we went out to dinner. I know, Father's Day isn't until tomorrow, but to beat the crowds on Father's Day, Mother's Day, Valentine's Day, etc., we usually go out to eat on a day other than the actual day. Also, the In-N-Out truck will be at church tomorrow night, so he'll still be getting one of his favorite meals tomorrow!

The restaurant James chose: The Cheesecake Factory
The meal James chose: well, it's better if you just see it for yourself.

It has been such a joy to watch my husband become a daddy. He is so great with Hannah and she absolutely LOVES him! She giggles whenever she sees him and gives off a HUGE smile!!! In the picture at the beginning of this post, she crawled under his arm and stood up as close to him as she could! She had to get her daddy time in, since he's at work for much of her awake time. So cute!!! Moments like these just melt my mommy heart! There is nothing quite like watching the man that you love, love your kids - it is so precious! I am so thankful to God for the man that He has given me and for his relatively new role as Daddy!

My Husband's Helper

The other day, James was listening to a sermon by Matt Chandler and something he said really struck me. The funny thing is, it's something I had always known, but never really realized, if that makes any sense. Once I explain what I'm talking about, it should be a little more clear.

Have you ever thought about the context of Genesis 2:18? It says, "Then the Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make a helper suitable for him.'" This took place when Adam, and the world, was still in his/its perfect, sinless state. Wow! I knew my role as a wife was important, but this really helps to drive it home! It wasn't because of his sin or because of the fallen state of the world that Adam needed a helper. No, he needed one before that! And I don't say this to belittle my husband. I say it because it helps me understand just how important my role as helper is and that even in a perfect world, my role would still be the same!

As a Home Ec major at a Christian college, I had the privilege of learning from some very godly and wise women. I remember one of them telling us that part of the role of a wife is to take care of her husband, his needs, his home, his family, etc. in such a manner that he is free to do his job without distraction. In other words, he can focus on his job (providing for the family) without being weighed down by having to worry about what is or is not going on at home. This is something I try to remind myself of everyday as I go about doing the sometimes mundane and tedious tasks around the house.

As I look at our culture, I am saddened by how far we have strayed from God's plan for women. We are constantly bombarded with the lie that unless we earn a living, have our own money, and make our own decisions, we are worthless. Submission is seen as weakness and as letting our husbands walk all over us. And, to be honest, sometimes I find myself falling for these lies, which is why it is all the more important to be immersed in the Truth of God's Word. It is here that we realize just how valuable and exciting the role of a woman is when we follow God's plan and design. When I recognize what God's plan is, it gives me motivation and an excitement to fulfill my role as helper.

Having a daughter has really caused me to think of this issue all the more. How am I going about my role as a helper? What is my attitude towards it as displayed through my actions? Am I joyously going about my day, taking care of my husband, my daughter, and the house, or do I have a spirit of complaining? Even when it comes to the chores which I dislike the most, I still need to do them with a joyful heart and attitude. Even my countenance while I go through the day says a lot about my heart. I want my daughter to grow up realizing the importance of the role of a wife and to see the joy that results from obeying God's design. I understand that at her young age (9 months), she isn't able to tell what my attitude toward my role is, but I need to set a pattern now so that when she is older, God can use me to teach her how wonderful it is to be a women. I pray that God will use me to teach her many biblical principles throughout her lifetime - this being one of them.

A Great Tool for Bargain Shopping!!!

I don't know what it is, but something about getting as much as possible for as little as possible really excites me! I always enjoy seeing how little I can spend on groceries each month - it's almost a game for me! My sister had told me about a great website a while back, but I had never really taken the time to look at it - until this weekend. Boy, do I wish I had looked at it sooner, because it's great (not to mention, it's free!)! It's called couponmom.com and it pairs up grocery store sales in your area with coupons to get some really great deals! It saves you the time of having to sort through grocery ads and your coupons. It even includes the unadvertised sales, which is where I have found are the best savings (click on "Grocery Deals by State" on the left-hand side of the site). This morning I bought $50 worth of groceries for $15!!! I was so excited! I think this will be a website I will check weekly!

Hannah's Check-Up

Today was Hannah's 9-month check-up! She weighs 19 lbs, 3 oz. (not too far behind her cousins, who are 13 months old!!!) and is 2' 4.75". She is 58th percentile for weight, which is amazing, considering her oh-so-cute chubbiness! The REALLY surprising thing is that she's in the 87th percentile for height! Now, I'm assuming part of that is due to error in measurement, as measuring a baby isn't the easiest task, but the doctor did comment that she even LOOKS tall.

We also got the go-ahead to start finger foods!! I'm excited, yet scared at the same time! Excited because I can't wait to watch Hannah's reaction to the new foods, and scared because our dining room floor is carpet! Guess we'll be moving her high chair into the kitchen!

Right after her appointment, I had an appointment because I've been having back pain for almost a week now, which is hard to deal with when you've got a little one! Anyway, the doctor diagnosed it as a minor bulging disc. He gave me some exercises to strengthen that part of my back and said that it usually takes at least 4-6 weeks for the pain to go away - yikes!

On another note, Hannah got her first some-what major battle wound today. Her forehead met the leg of one of our dining room chairs. She now has a nice knot and bruise on her forehead - poor thing! I expect more of these occurrences as she continues to explore and gets more and more brave (she pulls herself up on furniture to stand and then lets go once she's standing - however, she doesn't quite have the balance for that yet, as demonstrated today!). After less than a minute of hard crying, she recovered, so we're all happy again!

Happy 3/4th Birthday!!!

Today our precious little Hannah turns 9-months-old!! It's hard to believe that we've had her for 9 months already - where does the time go?! She is such a blessing to James and me; more so than I ever thought possible! I thought since it's her "month day," I would give you all a little update on her and her development.

Last time I posted about Hannah, she had just been diagnosed with pneumonia. I'm happy to say that she is a healthy, happy little girl again! And we now know that she LOVES amoxicillin! It was like dessert for her! She would fuss when she finished each dose, because she wanted more. I guess I'd rather have that than have to try to force feed her!

Hannah now has TWO teeth!!! It was funny when she got the first one, because she wasn't used to having anything in her mouth, so it must have felt weird for her to all of the sudden have something in her mouth all of the time. She would play with her tooth with her tongue and lips and ended up making all sorts of very funny and cute faces!!!

She is starting to learn what freedom is and is busy exploring! She is SOOOO close to crawling! She gets up on her hands and knees and rocks, but hasn't figured out that she actually has to move her arms and legs in order to move her body! So, for now, she gets from point A to point B by rolling. She has, however, figured out how to get from laying on her belly to sitting up, so that makes for a happy baby when she's tired of laying down! On a related note, earlier this week she rolled over to the stereo and turned it on. It took James and I a while to figure out where the music was coming from! Guess it's time to get the baby fences out of the garage!

As far as language develepment goes, she started babbling consonants and vowel combinations about a month ago. It started with "bababa" and has expanded somewhat. She can now say, "Bapa," which is my dad, and "Mom," which melts my heart!!! I don't think she associates the correct people with those names, but it melts my heart nontheless!

She is such a happy little girl and keeps James and I laughing all of the time! We have enjoyed watching her grow and learn so far and are looking forward to each step in her life!!! We are praying that the Lord will draw her to Himself and that she will grow up to lead a life that honors and glorifies Him. We are so thankful that God chose to bless us with her and can't imagine what we would be doing now if we didn't have her (life definitely wouldn't be quite as exciting!). :)

Oh yes. Another new talent that she has, which I was just reminded of because she's doing it right now is what some of my friends have called the "vacuum superpower." She lets me know when it's time to vacuum (which lately has been about every other day in the living room) by picking things out of the carpet! Thankfully they haven't gone in the mouth yet, but she does like to pick them up and play with them. Silly baby! Her 9-month check-up is on Tuesday, so I'll give you all her new stats (she's so big now!) then.