I'm Not a Feminist...Or Am I?

This summer, my church's women's Bible Study is on the topic of "Becoming a True Woman." If you haven't already realized it, femininity (according to the Bible) and God's plan and design for women is something I highly value - it is a passion for me. Sadly, however, our society has strayed far from true femininity. In fact, the feminist movement has "defeminized" (if that's a word) women and has striven to make women as much like men as possible.

We are going through the book, Becoming God's True Woman, edited by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, and watching a video series from "True Woman," a conference that was held in Chicago last year. In the video we watched last week, Mary Kassian went over the history of feminism. It was very interesting to see how we went from the "Leave it to Beaver" society in the 50's to where we are today.

While I'd like to think that I'm far from being a feminist, I was reminded just last night at how I have let worldly feminism creep into my life. Yesterday was one of those days. You know, the ones where you feel like it's never going to end and your list of things to do goes on forever. It had been a long day, and my evening was just beginning. I had bathed the baby (which is exhausting in and of itself), fed her, and gotten her ready for bed. Then, the pile of dishes in the kitchen stared me down. Dinner was one of those meals where it seems like I ended up using every dish and utensil in my kitchen - or at least all of the ones that should be hand washed. After cleaning up the dinner mess, I still had to clean up and organize the house for the day and fold the laundry that was sitting in the dryer, just calling my name. I was exhausted, and frankly, I just wanted to sit on the couch and do nothing. In fact, I found myself thinking that it would be so much easier to just work a 9-5 job instead of having to take care of the house and my family. It would be so nice to have a job that I could leave at the end of the day and be done with. However, I am "stuck" at work. I LIVE at work and there is always something that I can and/or need to be doing. There is no lunch break, no 15-minute breaks, no weekends, no holidays, etc. Even though James offers his assistance, my job is still physically and, sometimes, emotionally draining. Why can't I just have a "normal" job. Then it hit me! I had a feminist attitude - the same attitude that started and fueled the feminist movement. What an awakening that was for me! At that moment, I was thinking that society's definition of a true woman was better than God's definition of a true woman.

One of the ways the feminist revolution began was through Consciousness Raising Groups. These were groups of women who would get together to discuss their feelings about being a woman. Basically, it was an opportunity for women to vent about how miserable their lives were and discuss the advantage that men had. As they listened and began to participate in these groups, even women who weren't unhappy in their role as a housewife began to share these feelings of dissatisfaction and discontent, and the revolution spread rapidly. It was those same sinful, selfish feelings that I was having last night that greatly contributed to feminism. All I could do was pray. Pray that God would change my heart at that moment and that I would see that God's plan was the best thing for me. I don't even want to imagine what could or would happen if I let those feelings take hold of me. Yes, being a wife and mother is hard and sometimes I just want to be able to "clock out," but there is great beauty this work. I just need to look at it through a biblical perspective instead of a worldly perspective.

My heart is truly burdened for girls in the church. I pray that they will see how beautiful and GOOD God's design is and choose to follow Him rather than what society is trying to embed in them. I know that I have a responsibility to teach them and to lead them by example. Titus 2:3-5 says, "Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored." That's a HUGE responsibility! I pray that God would use me as a tool in teaching the next generation just what it means to be a woman. I pray that my daughter will grow up to value God's design for her and that she will be a "worker at home." Whether she gets married or not, has kids or not, she is called to display her femininity as God designed it. As we watch society stray farther and farther from God's great plan, it is all the more important for us to daily CHOOSE to follow Him and to teach it to our children and those around us. The feminist movement started with just a small group of women and spread to what it is today. I am excited to be part of a relatively small group of women who are part of a new counterrevolution!

Disclaimer: After thinking about it, I realized it might sound like I'm not happy being a wife and a mother. So let me just make it clear that I absolutely LOVE my job as a wife and a mother and I am SO THANKFUL that I have a husband who is willing and able to work hard to provide for our family so that I am able to be at home. It's just that, well, I'm sinful (big surprise, there!) and sometimes I don't find joy in my job. But God is gracious and faithful to show me my sin and selfishness and lead me toward repentance. :)